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    Sean Daily is an English major from New Jersey now living in Las Vegas, the Other City of Lights. "I consider 'Fear and Loathing in Las Vegas' to be comfort reading, I like the al pastor tacos at Tacos Mexico and I count among my literary influences the Chainsaw from 'Doom'. 'RRRRRR! You don't like that, do you, Mr. Undead Marine! RRRRRR!'"

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12-16-09 Quite Bizarre Factlets… Like Hentai Jesus

Posted by Sean on December 16, 2009

I came across this post recently over at a blog called Listverse, which is a collection of Top 10 and Top Integer Other Than 10 lists: 15 Quite Bizarre Factlets. I take it that this is a Top 10 15 list of the most useless information in the world.

But we here at One Neat Thing a Day don’t think any information is useless! We’re the Island of Misfit Toys for data, dope, knowledge and lore of every race, creed and color. And three of the factlets listed in 15 Quite Bizarre Factlets struck me as rather appropriate for the holidays, such as:

6. Did you know that santa has a special friend that travels with him? His name is krampus and he beats people with sticks – especially females. He is pictured above. The story of the krampus has been used for centuries to frighten children into behaving before Christmas.

Actually, it’s “Krahm-poos”, according to this commercial.

7. A surprisingly large number of people believe in the Ancient Astronaut theory in which aliens are said to have come to earth in pre-history and given man knowledge (or, in some cases, to have bred with man to give us intelligence). Some proponents of the theory believe that all major religions on earth were started by these visiting space-creatures.

That’s right, Spock died for your sins.

But my favorite useless little factoid in this post is didn’t even crack the Top 10:

13. Shingō village (Japan) claims to be the last resting-place of Jesus, buried in the “Tomb of Jesus.” According to the local lore, Jesus traveled to Japan at the age of 21, where he studied theology for 12 years, after which he returned to Judea at the age of 34. He did not die on the cross at Golgotha. Instead his brother, Isukiri, took his place on the cross, while Jesus fled across Siberia, Alaska, and finally to Mutsu Province, in northern Japan, where he became a rice farmer, married, and raised a family near what is now Shing ō.

I find the thought of a Japanese Jesus strangely compelling. I mean, think of the possibilities. Samurai Jesus! Cat Girl Jesus! Kaiju Jesus (“Ah! Run! It is Jesus-ra!”)! Chibi Jesus! Manga Jesus! Shonen Jesus (“Hey, you money-changers are in my father’s house! KA… ME… HA… ME… HAAAAAAAA!”)! Shojo Jesus! Bishonen Jesus! Hentai Jesus! That’s right, The Da Vinci Code with tentacle rape!

Okay, I’m going to stop now before I’m struck dead by lightning.

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2 Responses to “12-16-09 Quite Bizarre Factlets… Like Hentai Jesus”

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