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    Sean Daily is an English major from New Jersey now living in Las Vegas, the Other City of Lights. "I consider 'Fear and Loathing in Las Vegas' to be comfort reading, I like the al pastor tacos at Tacos Mexico and I count among my literary influences the Chainsaw from 'Doom'. 'RRRRRR! You don't like that, do you, Mr. Undead Marine! RRRRRR!'"

    Shanoah Alkire is our Discordian at large. "Born in Santa Cruz, I grew up in Grass Valley and the Bay Area, and now lurk in Las Vegas. My literary influences include Ray Bradbury, Lewis Carroll, and Douglas Adams. I also program as a hobby, and currently maintain the Gtk port of Angband. You can find a rather old bio of me here."

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Posts Tagged ‘Happy Media’

3-9-10 Why I Will Never Ever Ever EVER Be Able to Take the Tea Party Seriously

Posted by Sean on March 9, 2010

Me, too, Shanoah. I, too, am politicked out. Still, I gots enough juice left in me to share this one little tidbit: why I will never be able to take Tea Party seriously.

As you know, many media outlets often refer to members of the  Tea Party movement as Tea Baggers, which of course instantly brings to my mind this scene from John Waters’ Pecker [1] (starring a criminally underemployed Eddie Furlong, by the way).

Not Work Safe, just because it’s John Waters. Courtesy of nessthing.

Jesus, that’s scary, ain’t it? It’s almost as good as the job the Republicans did for the word “liberal” – almost.

[1] Which should tell you something about my mind.

Posted in fnord, From Sean, Funny, Not Work Safe, Politics and Other Things In Which I'm Not Qualified | Tagged: , , , , , , , , , , , , | 1 Comment »

3-4-10 Satan/Beelzebub: Why Vote for the Lesser of Two Evils?

Posted by Sean on March 4, 2010

Neither do I, Shanoah. I will never regret voting against Jesus/Mary McCain/Palin.

Problem is, that’s a lot of what my vote for Obama was. I stumped for the guy, I voted for the guy, but in the end my vote was largely a vote to keep John “Bomb Bomb Bomb Bomb Bomb Iran” McCain and Sarah “I’m a Yooper Even Though I’m From Alaska, You Betcha!” Palin out of the White House, not a vote to put Obama in it.

Fourteen months in and, even with majorities in both Houses, Obama hasn’t done a whole lot that impresses me. True, a lot of it was picking up the pieces from Bush and, quite frankly, a year of nothing is a refreshing change from eight years of Jesus-Christ-that-idiot-did-what-now. Still, all the changey hopey stuff that we heard about during his campaign is starting to turn into a whole lot of the same old thing.

You’re not supposed to hold your nose when you go to the polls. Maybe that’s what you have to expect, but it’s not what you’re supposed to expect.

I may be asking too much of the American voting system, though. I mean, the only candidate that I wouldn’t have serious reservations about voting for is me, and you don’t want me to be president. These would be just a few of the policies during my remarkably brief administration, which would end either in military junta or armed rebellion. [1]

  • I would replace the expensive, pointless, unethical and boring War on Terror with a War on People Named Ralph.
  • I would make Spock my science advisor and get very cranky when I’m told that he’s a fictional character.
  • I would demand that the Vatican make me Pope and then let them know, with a subtle use of nuclear weapons, what will happen if I am not made Pope.
  • I would invite Osama bin Laden and Rush Limbaugh to fight it out in a Texas steel cage death match (“Two fascist extremist ideologies enter, one fascist extremist ideology leaves.”). Sarah Palin would be the between-rounds card girl. [2]
  • I would replace the National Anthem with the Misfits’ Mommy, Can I Go Out and Kill Tonight.
  • I would make Jedi the national religion and then use my mad Force choke skeelz on anyone who even mentions “separation of church and state”.
  • I would replace the F-22 Raptor fighter jet with Veritechs and get very cranky when I’m told that they’re fictional, too.
  • I would balance the federal budget by selling Arkansas… that is, if anyone would even buy it.
  • I would replace standardized tests in our schools with “Hentai or Not Hentai?”.
  • I would frantically summon my cabinet to my SitRep Room at 3:30 a.m., then pull out a copy of Left Behind and, with a voice slurred into incomprehensibility by cheap gin, yell, “My God, have any of you read this shit?”
  • And if I don’t have a SitRep Room then dammit I’ll make a SitRep Room. It will be very Wii-intensive.
  • My bank bailouts would consist of bailing bank officials out of a plane at 50,000 feet. I might even give them parachutes.
  • My Middle East policy would consist of burning a million tons of chronic in the West Bank, then airlifting in 10 million pizzas and two million XBoxes.
  • All Americans would be forced to adopt fake Indian names. Mine would be Runs Naked Through the Woods.
  • Anyone, and I mean anyone, who tries to make more courtroom porn like Law & Order or forensics porn like CSI will earn himself a come to Jesus with the new U. S. Attorney General, Jigsaw from the Saw movies.
  • And yes, I will get very cranky when I hear that Jigsaw is also a fictional character.
  • The national language would be Huttese. Ho ho ho ho…

Barring that, I guess I could vote for these guys. Having them in charge would rawk.

Courtesy of pipes90.

[1] Dave Barry much?

[2] Try and get that image out of your mind.

Posted in From Sean, Funny, Happy Media, Politics and Other Things In Which I'm Not Qualified | Tagged: , , , , , , , , , , , , , | 1 Comment »

2-24-10 Orson Welles and Citizen Bat-Man

Posted by Sean on February 24, 2010

Speaking of superheroes with serious father issues and bat fetishes

You may have heard that Orson Welles was planning to make a movie based on Batman. Mark Millar broke the story here at Comic Book Resources in 2003 when his friend, movie critic Lionel Hutton, was given “unprecedented access” to Welles’ estate. Hutton discovered that, after completion of 1946’s The Stranger, Welles had begun serious planning on an adult psycho-drama, but combined with what he described as the ‘heart-racing excitement of the Saturday morning serials, given a respectable twist and a whole new style of kinetic direction unlike anything ever attempted in American cinema.'”

Welles had supposedly gotten as far as drawing production sketches, writing a treatment and draft script and even getting stars to commit to the project: “George Raft signing up for Two-Face (after Bogart turned it down), James Cagney as The Riddler, Basil Rathbone as The Joker and Welles’ former lover Marlene Dietrich as a very exotic Catwoman with the same salubrious past Miller gave the character forty years later in Batman: Year One.” It blew up because of his ego (surprise surprise). He wanted to be Batman and Bruce Wayne, but “the studio” – which remained unidentified in Millar’s story – wanted Gregory Peck.

The tragedy for movie buffs is that, like Welles’ proposed adaptation of Conrad’s Heart of Darkness, the world wouldn’t get to see a Batman feature until the campy 1966 movie with Adam West. The tragedy for comic-book aficionados is that our big shot at respectability, when the genre was so young that people hadn’t made up their minds about us yet, was blown because of an argument over something as small and petty as casting. The movie could have been a disaster, it’s impossible to say, but the production notes, the treatment and the first draft I’ve been reading over the last couple of weeks makes me think this could have redefined cinema. This could have been his masterpiece and, who knows, might have launched the superhero renaissance we’re undergoing at the moment with quality cast and directors two or three generations earlier. John Ford following up “The Bat-Man” with a “Captain America” movie? Cary Grant and Katharine Hepburn as Clark Kent and Lois Lane? In some weird, parallel reality these things are DVDs collecting dust on our video-shelves and Clint Eastwood is wishing some studio would give his funny, old Unforgiven cowboy flick half a chance at the next pitch meeting.

Yes, you wonder what could have been if Welles’ had been able to put a veneer of respectability on the comic book genre, which has suffered from low public and self esteem since birth. Sounds almost too good to be true, doesn’t it?

Well, guess what?

Comic Books Resources later revealed here that the whole thing was a hoax perpetrated by Millar, complete with a Batman costume sketch by his friend Bryan Hitch. Welles, the perpetrator of one of the 20th century’s greatest hoaxes, would have been proud.

I know I swallowed it. I mean, I saw the production sketches! Well, a sketch! It had to be true!

However, beyond my gullibility, it did make sense. Welles was a young Turk in those days, a Hollywood outsider who wasn’t tied down to what was “respectable”. The guy was the Shadow, fer cryin’ out loud! As Millar pointed out:

It’s no secret that Orson Welles had a love of the pulps, having voiced The Shadow on radio and conceiving the illustrious War Of The Worlds scam, but what’s lesser known is his love of comic-books right up to his death in 1985. What’s especially startling is that his appreciation for the medium was no real secret and he even wrote an article for The Village Voice in 1973 raving about the Denny O’Neil/ Neal Adams “Green Lantern/Green Arrow” book (The Real Counter-Culture Lives Here) and even attending, with no real fanfare, one of the earliest New York comic conventions organised by Phil Seuling.

So it was just smoke and mirrors. Still, you have to wonder… what would have an Orson Welles-directed Batman movie been like? Sirrus79 wondered that, too, and decided to stitch together a two-part “extended trailer” of 1947’s smash hit The Bat-Man, with Orson Welles as Bruce Wayne and The Bat-Man, Edward G. Robinson as the Penguin, Marlene Dietrich as Cat-Woman and Mercury Theatre veteran Joseph Cotten as Commissioner Gordon.

Part 1

Part 2

Posted in bulldada, From Sean, Happy Media | Tagged: , , , , , , , , , | 1 Comment »

2-14-10 Hentai Valentine’s Day!

Posted by Sean on February 14, 2010

We interrupt this David Byrne and Brian Eno theme to bring you a catgirl being eaten out.

Do we even have to mention that this isn’t work safe?

From Hime Kishi Lilia or Princess Knight Lilia. Courtesy of MarcusSaide.

Posted in cats, From Sean, Happy Media, Not Work Safe, Wenches For Your Toolbox | Tagged: , , , , , , , , , , | 2 Comments »

1-27-10 The Real Tuesday Weld and Alex Budovskiy – Return I Will to Old Brazil

Posted by Sean on January 27, 2010

Continuing our themeless theme, here’s a short by Alex Budovskiy and The Real Tuesday Weld, Return I Will to Old Brazil. The song is The Real Tuesday Weld’s take on the standard Brazil, apparently with guest Pan flautist Zamfir.

Insert insightful Terry Gilliam/Jonathan Pryce reference here.

And if you think you’ve seen Budovskiy and The Real Tuesday Weld here before, perhaps you have.

Posted in Uncategorized | Tagged: , , , , , | Leave a Comment »

1-20-10 Blu and Dave Ellis – COMBO

Posted by Sean on January 20, 2010

Continuing our themeless theme, here’s a collaboration between the art collective Blu and Dave Ellis called COMBO. Is it grafitti? Is it animation? Is it demolition? Who cares?

And yes, it does loop. Once.

Oh, and if you think you’ve seen Blu here before, perhaps you have.

Courtesy of notblu. Well, I’m glad they cleared that up.

Posted in FREAKIN' IMPORTANT MAN, From Shanoah, Happy Media | Tagged: , , , , , , | Leave a Comment »

1-18-10 The Little Tiger on the Sunflower

Posted by Sean on January 18, 2010

Continuing our themeless theme, here’s a beautiful cartoon from Russian animator Leonid Nosyrev, The Little Tiger on the Sunflower, released in 1981. A short interview with Nosyrev about this film can be found here.

BTW, this takes place near in the Ussuri River region in northeast China, near the Russian border.

Courtesy of perennial One Neat Thing a Day favorite Niffiwan (blog here).

Posted in From Sean, Happy Media | Tagged: , , , , , | Leave a Comment »

1-15-10 Simon’s Cat – Fly Guy

Posted by Sean on January 15, 2010

We continue our themeless theme today with another Simon’s Cat short (site here) by Simon Tofield: Fly Guy. Anyone who has or once had a cat can probably sympathize with poor Simon.

And if you think you’ve seen Simon’s Cat here before, perhaps you have.

And while we’re on the subject of egwegious wittle Bwitish kitty cuteness… here’s a bemusing little short featuring Cyriak Harris‘ cat entitled, appropriately enough, Meow Mix. Again, if you think you’ve heard that name here before… again, perhaps you have.

Posted in cats, Funny, Happy Media, Uncategorized | Tagged: , , , , , , , , , | Leave a Comment »

12-24-09 Christmas Eve, or “You’ll Shoot Your Eye Out, Kid”

Posted by Sean on December 24, 2009

It’s Christmas eve, which means all the good little Christian boys and girls are eagerly awaiting Santa Claus, and the all the good little non-Christian boys and girls are eagerly awaiting getting squat this year. Many of the good little non-Christian boys and girls are also poor and going to go to hell when they die, I hear.

But, hey, that’s what you get for worshipping the wrong god, kids.

Speaking of Santa Claus… unless I miss my guess, TNT is going to be having their “24 Hours of A Christmas Story” marathon tomorrow. Now, I like A Christmas Story. However, 24 hours of anything can you sick of it real fast.

And that’s a shame, because A Christmas Story is possibly the best anti-Christmas movie made until Bad Santa. Parts of it are very sweet, but other parts…

Well, just check out Ralphie’s magical visit to Santa.

Courtesy of CQblogger.

Posted in From Sean, Funny, Happy Media | Tagged: , , , , , , , | 1 Comment »

12-17-09 The Boondocks – History Of Christmas

Posted by Sean on December 17, 2009

Waitaminnit, hold on…

(checks Wikipedia)

Black Winter Day was released in 1995? Then how come the video looks like it was made in the early 1980s?

I have questions, people, and they’ve kept me out of the better schools.

Anyhoo, your neat thing today by me. One of my favorite cartoons is The Boondocks [1]. I love Grandad. I love gangsta-in-training Riley. I love Klansman-stuck-in-a-black-man’s-body Uncle Ruckus. Most of all, I love Huey. He’s exactly the kind of hyper-intelligent, sharp-eyed smart-ass I wish I was when I was a kid.

In keeping with the holiday theme of this blog, here’s Huey trying to explain Christmas to Grandad. (This was right after he was given permission to stage a Christmas pageant, complete with Samurai Jesus) From A Huey Freeman Christmas.

“Actually, Grandad, Christmas is a pagan holiday, and Jesus probably hates you for celebrating.”

Courtesy of CantStopBoondocks.

[1] By the way, the opening song for The Boondocks,  if you don’t know already, is Judo Flip by Asheru.

Posted in Facts for Freaks and Other Criminals, From Sean, Funny, Gettin' Yer Pagan Freak On, Happy Media, I'm probably going to hell for this | Tagged: , , , , , , , , , , , , | 1 Comment »

 
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