I HAVE RETURNED! I have swum through endless oceans of time and space, past the universe, past reason, PAST SANITY! in search of wisdom! knowledge! good schools! reasonable access to public transportation! AND WISDOM! I have sat with elders of a gentle race this world has seldom seen and talked of days for which they sit and wait, when all will be revealed. Ooooo, and it was heavy, baby! I BRING YOU!…

Um…

(searches pockets)

…Some crumpled cocktail napkins, half a circus peanut and a spiral-bound notebook with “BEWARE THE MIDGET” scrawled on every square inch.

Hmm.

Y’know, I was kind of thinking this Prometheus thing would be way cooler than this…

Anyway, you’re probably wondering why you haven’t seen me here since, dear gods, since August. Well, one reason is that I was just burned out from blogging. It happens… usually with a little more warning than I gave. I can’t believe that anyone missed me, but if you did, I’m sorry.

But I have another, much more legitimate reason for not blogging (at least for the last month)! That’s right, it’s National Novel Writing Month! 50,000 words in 30 days! Pure hell! Now I know what those American POWs felt like on the Bataan Death March… if those POWs had been forced to type over 200 pages of Courier New 12-point in 30 days! “Raust schnell, American dog! Your metaphors are trite and your plot derivative! Another night in The Box for YOU!” [1]

And you know what? I did it. I have a first draft of an urban fantsay novel about revisionist dragons, complete with one character undergoing a sex change when I realized I needed a romantic subplot. Now all I need is about 20 rewrites, and I’ll have my first novel!

Kill me. Just kill me now.

Anyway, I could continue Shanoah’s muppet thread with, say, this Baby Tooth version of a dragon dance, courtesy of MarshalGrover…

But I think, in honor of my novel about revisionist dragons, I think I’ll go with a short about revisionist dragons. This is Ritterschlag from the Institute for Animation, Visual Effects and Digital Postproduction Film Academie of Baden-Württemberg, the only movie that dares ask the question: “Why do dragons keep kidnapping fair damsels?”

Courtesy of axiomcodex.

You’re lucky I didn’t post something about sex changes.

[1] Yes, I know my Japanese are speaking German. And you know what? I don’t care.

Yeah, Sean, the bleeping out innocent words thing seems to be a trend going around. I saw another one with a clip of the Count, bleeping out every instance of the words ‘count’ or ‘counting’. You know, I wonder how long this Sesame Street theme will last? I had a good dozen or so clips stashed away on my hard drive, and I’ve been dipping into them to some extent…

Anyways, a lot of celebrities have been on Sesame Street, too, and I thought I’d play a few notable ones.

A B… Or Not a B? – Patrick Stewart

Patrick Stewart may be best known as Jean Luc Picard on Star Trek, but he started as a Shakespearian actor, and always will be one. And in clips like this, you can tell. Not to discount his performances in places like the X-Men, or Robin Hood: Men In Tights, or course.

Hi De Ho Man – Cab Calloway

You have to admit, singing the “Hi De Ho Man” in the streets is one way to get to know your neighbors. And one that appeals to the Discordian in me. Of course, anything starring Cab Calloway is likely to be sheer awesomeness…

U Really Got a Hold On Me – Smoky Robinson

And here is Smoky Robinson being hassled by the letter U. I’ll admit, I’m now looking at this song in a rather different way then I did…

Ah, well, the Alligator King may be fearsome, but what animal has more pride then the frog? The Scottish frog, at least:

The Frogs in the Glen

This clip has a great atmospheric background, and I love the bagpipe playing on it. It is very much a Scottish national pride type of song, despite being about frogs, and I’ve always liked that sort of thing. Even if I am more likely to be around buslines, and subways, then scottish moors.

Subway!

“Buy a token now for a ride that’s super wow”

You could lose your purse, or you might lose something worse…”

I know I’ve said this before, but you could not get away with this on a kids show these days. Which is sad. Fun song.

Telephone Band

You ever wonder on songs like Jim Croce’s “Operator”, why the operator supposedly at the other end of the phone line puts up with it? Well, they obviously did as well. And, yeah, this is way too catchy of a song…

Yeah, I remember that one Sean. I personally thought it was funny. It’s got that level of innuendo in it that parents pick up on but kids don’t, which makes it fun for all ages.

And it’s not like Sesame Street doesn’t have any skits telling kids what to do if they feel uncomfortable, after all. Check this one:

Don’t Touch Me!

Think that orange monster was the type Betty Lou had in mind? That monster seemed to be riffing off of “Of Mice and Men”, really. And, you know, there is an amazing volume of old Sesame Street clips on youtube. Here’s another music video:

Danger’s No Stranger

A have to be amused some of the items in the list of things to watch out for in here. And it is, generally, a very catchy song. There seems to be a bit of everything, though. Even Cookie Monster doing rap.

Healthy Food

For all the singing, I can’t help but notice that he never eats any of the healthy food shown. Of course, that could be because he’s singing. The clips with Cookie Monster’s silhouette are just freaky, though…