Sister Christian’s Golden Island

I was actually planning on doing another political post, this time with anti-both candidate songs, and more interspersed positive and negative songs on both sides.

I have them ready, (Including that well-known song “Bomb, Bomb, Bomb, Bomb, Bomb Iran“), enough for more then one post, in fact, but I decided to take a break for a post, to prevent an overdose of politics.

Too much politics can be lethal.

And my reaction to cheerleaders has always been something along these lines:

–

“How loose; how loose; how loose is my goose…“

The anthropologist studies the natives carefully from afar as they do what appears to be a primitive fertility ritual. There is much room for study in the quaint customs of -

“My goose; My goose is totally loose…“

*sigh*

–

In any case, today I have two themes going on; Sisters and Christians. Not to mention the usual theme of “songs I really like”.

But with all the politics going on, it’s rather appropriate that the first song is by America:

Sister Golden Hair – America

Honestly, I think everyone knows this song. It’s heartfelt, with lovely lyrics. Oh, and did you know the line “Will you meet me in the middle; Will you meet me in the air?” was originally “Will you meet me in VA?”?

Early on, Jackson Browne misheard it, and Gerry Beckley decided he preferred the misheard version.

And now, lets segue from Sister Golden Hair to Sister Christian:

Sister Christian – Night Ranger

This song, OTOH, is about how fast Night Rangers drummer, Kelly Keegy’s sister Christy was growing up. She, apparently, was mortified by it.

So, no, no fancy metaphors or anything. Of course the hook in the song for me has to be:

You’re motoring
What’s your price for flight
In finding mister right
You’ll be alright tonight

And now, from one Christian to a whole island of them:

Christian Island – Gordon Lightfoot

Gordon Lightfoot shows his usual skill at writing songs here. Incidentally, Christian Island is an island in Ontario, populated mainly by American Indians. Who, naturally, are not particularly known for being Christians. Funny how things work out.

This is the type of song that just takes you away from where you are, and puts you right in the middle of the scene he’s describing. Some songs help you get more riled up; this is the type that you just can’t help but relax.

Tall and strong she slips along
I sing for her a song
And she leans into the wind
Shes a good old boat and she’ll stay afloat
Through the toughest gales and keep smilin’
When the summer ends we will rest again
In the lee of Christian Island

Of course Gordon Lightfoot has an incredible voice. He could probably sing verses involving gunning down small children, and I’d still enjoy listening to it, until the lyrics kicked in.[1]

That’s it for today, though. I’ll probably be back to politics tomorrow, and possibly even people shooting laser beams out of their eyes.

[1] The sad thing is that I originally wrote such a verse for this post, but deleted it.[2]

[2] Not because of delicate sensibilities. Because I didn’t like the scansion.[3]

[3] I can be very picky about these things. That’s why a lot of filks and parodies I start never make it.[4]

[4]Whee! Footnotes![5]

[5] And I actually picked up the multiple footnote thing during a period where I posted to alt.fan.douglas-adams a lot, Sean. Besides whimsical use of footnotes, there were also things like entire threads of conversation without the letter ‘e’.[6]

[6] Which is difficult to do. How long can you go without “the”, “he”, “she”, “very”, “ever”, lots of basic words you don’t think about?

[7] There is no footnote 7. [7]

8-2-08 Silly Season – We The Happy Proletariat Adore Our Fearless Leader

Y’know, sometimes the posts just write themselves.

As an independent thinking person, I am deeply suspicious of any song that touts any politician. Whenever I hear one, I’m always convinced that the next line is going to be about how the Happy People Love Their Great Leader, not to mention how The Great Proletariat Revolution Will Make The Imperialist Lackeys Drown In Oceans Of Their Own Blood. (I have the same reaction to cheerleaders. I’m always convinced that they’re going to end their cheers with “What’s that spell!” “Sun Myung Moon!”)

Anyhoo, your neat things (or thing, as I couldn’t find one of them on YouTube or Daily Motion) are from that very special dimly-lit corner of creepiness, the political song.

You may have heard that John Rich, of the country duo Big and Rich, has written a song in praise of John McCain with the jaw-droppingly clever title of Raising McCain. I know it’s true, my Associated Press tells me so. (Interesting commentary at Raising Kaine which, despite its name, is not pro-McCain)

Beth Fouhy of AP reports, “… the singer-songwriter has penned lyrics for a rock-infused anthem focused on the 5 1/2 years Republican presidential candidate John McCain spent as a prisoner of war in Vietnam and his refusal of an early release.” Some of the lyrics go: ‘”He stayed strong, stayed extra long til they let all the other boys out. Now we’ve got a real man with an American plan, we’re going to put him in the big White House,” with the refrain: “We’re all just raising McCain.”‘

Bush was supposed to be a “real man”, too, and look where it got us.

Rich debuted the song at a McCain campaign stop in Florida on Aug. 1 (if I’m reading the dates right) and unfortunately I can’t find a video of the song anywhere. This seems like a huge oversight on the part of McCain’s campaign. I mean, you’d think they’d have it up by now in order to give the blogosphere a chance to tear it apart. Ingrates. Look for that McCainalicious song on this bat channel in the coming days.

(As a side note, his partner, Big Kenny Alphin, donated $2,300 to Barack Obama’s campaign last year. I can’t make this stuff up. I’m not that good)

But you didn’t think we’d leave Obama unscathed, didja? Oh mais non, we may support Obama, but we here at One Neat Thing a Day are Equal Opportunity Raggers, and our duty is clear.

Ludacris recently released a pro-Obama song called Politics as Usual, off a mixtape called Gangsta Grillz: The Preview. Obama’s campaign has since come out against the song, calling it “outrageously offensive”. Story at Contact Music, among many other places, here.

Now, I don’t see why Obama is hating on Ludacris. I mean, what could possibly be wrong with lyrics like these (full spread at Live Leak here):

• (Obama) Said I handled his biz and I’m one of his favorite rappers/Well give Luda a special pardon if I’m ever in the slammer
• Hillary hated on you, so that bitch is irrelevant
• McCain don’t belong in ANY chair unless he’s paralyzed
• Yeah I said it cause Bush is mentally handicapped/Ball up all of his speeches and I throw ‘em like candy wrap/’Cause what you talking I hear nothing even relevant/And you the worst of all 43 presidents (Sean: Ok, this I can agree with)

But don’t listen to me. Click play and decide for yourself. Courtesy of fr3ship.