5-5-08 Badonkadonk

Yes yes yes, you already know about the JL421 Badonkadonk. But it’s a neat thing and I like it and I don’t care so I’m posting it nyah nyah nyah so there. I never said I was cutting-edge, just opinionated.

Anyway, what is the Badonkadonk? Isn’t that a term for good-looking junk in a woman’s trunk? Well, yes, but it’s also the name for one of the many fine products from NAO Designs, which is like the DARPA version of Archie McPhee. (If you don’t like the Badonkadonk, perhaps you’d be interested in NAO’s gourmet flamethrower, instead)

But you’re not answering my question! What is the Badonkadonk?! Well, it’s, um, it’s…

It’s this thing.

It looks like a hovercraft that the Humungous might have in his garage, but it actually runs on four off-road wheels powered by a 6hp gasoline engine; the wheels are hidden underneath that rubber skirt (and, for all I know, Photoshopped out for effect). It’s about nine feet long, four and a-half feet wide and high, and it can make about 40 mph.

And it has pyrotechnics, including two rear jets that, when triggered at the proper moment, make it look like it’s rocket-powered.

The thing sells for $19,995 through Amazon.com or NAO, who sell it as an “armored land cruiser/recreational tank”. [1] In other words, there’s no way in hell the ‘Donk is street-legal. About all you could do with this is put it on a trailer, drag it out to the dry lake bed and then scare the hell out of and/or barbecue any desert lifeform unfortunate enough to cross your path.

But who cares! It looks like a Jawa SUV! I – WANT – IT – NOW.

http://www.jl421.com/

Or if you want more traditional badonkadonk, then here’s Trace Adkins‘ Honky Tonk Badonkadonk, off 2005’s Songs About Me (and remixed on 2006’s Dangerous Man), and what is quite possibly the world’s first country-western gangsta rap video. Courtesy of rjp4505.

[1] By the way, people who bought this at Amazon.com - and yes, people have bought this thing through Amazon – also bought GTA IV and something called Forbidden LEGO: Build the Models Your Parents Warned You Against! by Ulrik Pilegaard and Mike Dooley… which should give you some idea of the people running around with armored land cruiser/recreational tanks.

Be afraid. Be very afraid.